Perhaps you, like many of your generation, are looking for something to put on your body (besides soap or jellybeans). This would be a good opportunity to stock up on nonedible cotton-based machine-washable torso-coverings. I would personally recommend one of their classic, old-school designs for maximum street cred:
Though of course, it is quite trendy to be new, original, and slightly more rare. Like a 100-panel wordless minicomic on a shirt, not like a delicious steak with kiwi-mustard sauce. This is not a shirt I think I would personally wear because I don't need to give everyone this much of an excuse to stare this closely at my chest, but not everyone has my problems or my modesty, and the design is rad regardless.
I'd possibly prefer to wear a shirt with a design that doesn't feel the need to confine itself to my chest. A shirt that says, "Guys, seriously, I am more than just my incredible rack. I also happen to like astronauts & spaceships & tentacles." Actually, Threadless has a lot of shirts about astronauts & ______. Here's another one... it's about astronauts & surfing, neither of which I do but both of which I'm interested in.
Being a Website on the Internet, Threadless also has its share of esoterically mopey shirts. And its share of shirts that are the exact antonym of esoterically mopey. If you can find a better antonym for esoterically mopey than a circus-themed t-rex, you should email me (I'd be willing to concede that cuuuute things are equally good antonyms, but not better).
And then they've got stuff that's just weird. But you like weird, right? We're all mad here. Remember, today only, Threadless's entire stock is selling for $9. They ship via your choice of USPS or UPS, and you can search their stock by handy things like in-stock shirt size and color, and you should go now while their servers aren't quite dead yet.